My apologies to Escalante's...
...because this turns out not to be their fault -- exactly the same sign is up inside the men's room in the Marriot half a block away, where we of La Casa de Celebración meet, come ev'ry Sunday mornin'. (Obviously we're very redneck Hispanics at La Casa -- which is to say, mis hermanos en Jesucristo provide plenty of Hispanic and I provide plenty of redneck. I suspect that until you've heard me singing a high tenor descant above the melody in my rich Okie español, you haven't...well, not lived exactly...hm, le mot juste has temporarily escaped me.)
At any rate, obviously the Sugar Land city council has actually passed some sort of law requiring every business in the area to put this sign up inside the men's rooms. Because, you know, God forbid some guy should drink while he was pregnant.
Thank God for guvmint, or else who would protect us from ourselves? And isn't it a good thing that city councilmen (or whatever local branch of busybodies passed this rule) are smarter than we are? I can't wait until they take over health care and solve all our medical problems -- such as, for example, fetal alcohol syndrome from fathers' drinking while pregnant. Paradise is just around the corner, bay-bee!
On a related note, an old joke from the Soviet Union:
Q. What's the best job to land if you never want to be unemployed for the rest of your life?
A. Sitting on a wall looking for the coming of True Communism.
To refresh your memory, here's the sign -- which, I remind you, appears to be posted in every men's room within a few blocks of the Sugar Land City Hall (based on my large sample size of, um, two separate establishments):