Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you...

...Happy Birthday, dear Anya,
Happy Birthday to you!

Yep, she's twenty-one years old now. And she's been counting down for a long time.

This reminds me of one of the many unintentionally hilarious things said on air by Ron Fairly, longtime gaffe-machine announcer for the Seattle Mariners:

"Alex Rodriguez turns twenty-one today, and it couldn't happen to a nicer guy."

As the years go by and Alex's true character shines through ever more clearly, that line just gets funnier and funnier.

By the way, I'm sort of singing the wrong song; what I ought to be singing is:

Я играю на гармошке У прохожих на виду К сожалению, день рождения Только раз в году!

Ya igráyu na garmóshkye U prokhózhikh na vidú. K sozhaléinyu, dyein rozhdéinya Tóilko ras v godú!

"I'm playing my accordion
In full view of the passers-by
What a pity that my birthday
Only comes once a year!"

Um...okay, you just have to have seen the movie...



This is actually a sweet but poignant little song, from the bleak days of the Soviet era, in which the gentle and ever-kindly Gyena the Crocodile deals with the actual grinding poverty of the Soviet commoner by building up a birthday celebration in his own imagination to substitute for the party he doesn't expect to be able to afford in real life. Here are all the lyrics, first in Russian and then in transliteration and then in a very loose Peril translation:

Пусть бегут неуклюже Пешеходы по лужам, А вода — по асфальту рекой. И неясно прохожим В этот день непогожий, Почему я веселый такой.		Puist byegút neuklyúzhe Peshekhódi po lúzham A vodá po asfáltu rekóy. I neyásno prokhózhim V étot dyein nepogózhiy, Pochemú ya vecéliy takóy.
Я играю на гармошке У прохожих на виду К сожалению, день рождения Только раз в году!	Ya igráyu na garmóshkye U prokhózhikh na vidú. K sozhaléinyu, dyein rozhdéinya Tóilko ras v godú!
Прилетит вдруг волшебник В голубом вертолете И бесплатно покажет кино. С днем рожденья поздравит И, наверно, оставит Мне в подарок пятьсот «эскимо».	Prilyetít vdruk volshébnik V golubóm vernolyétye I byecplátno pokázhet kinó. "C dnyem rozhdéinya!" pozdrávit I, navyérno, ostávit Mnye v podárok pyatcót "Eskimo".
Я играю на гармошке У прохожих на виду К сожалению, день рождения Только раз в году!	Ya igráyu na garmóshkye U prokhózhikh na vidú. K sozhaléinyu, dyein rozhdéinya Tóilko ras v godú!

"Let the pedestrians run clumsily through the puddles
Let the water run in rivers on the pavement
The passers-by can't figure out why,
On such an unpleasant day,
I'm so cheerful.

"I'm playing my accordion
In full view of the passers-by
What a pity that my birthday
Only comes once a year!

"A magician will drop in suddenly
Flying in a blue helicopter
And show me a movie, free of charge
He'll wish me "Happy Birthday"
And, probably, for a birthday present
He'll leave me five hundred ice cream sandwiches

"I'm playing my accordion
In full view of the passers-by
What a pity that my birthday
Only comes once a year!"

This reminds me: a while back I was in a local Polish restaurant, and there was a big party of Russians at the next table celebrating a birthday. And at one point several of them broke into one of Gyena's (that is, the crocodile's) songs -- but they picked "Goluboy Vagon" rather than the birthday song. I sang along happily with them but couldn't get up the nerve to ask them why they weren't singing "Puist Byegut Neuklyuzhe" instead. Don't guess I'll ever know the answer now. Still, while we're on the topic, here's "Goluboy Vagon":